A film by Victoria Verseau

Produced by Malin Hüber (HERFILM) & Mathilde Raczymow (Les Films du Bilboquet)

Documentary / 72 min / Sweden, France / 2024

Language: Swedish, English

Subtitles: English





Official selections

Karlovy Vary International Film Festival – Proxima Competition (World Premiere)


In an exploration of self-discovery, Victoria, Athena and Aamina navigate womanhood through loss and introspection, weaving past regrets and future aspirations in a poetic documentation of embracing true selves.


Victoria looks back in time to understand her transition and what it is that defines you as a woman. Having lost a close friend she shares her pain and embodied experience with Athena and Aamina, themselves on their own journeys of transition. Together they explore who they were then and who they are today, listening to the ghosts of the past, the laughs of the present  and the whispers of the future.

Director’s note

« The film is a deeply personal story based on my experience of transitioning and the loss of Meril, my only friend sharing the trans experience. Through this story, I reflect on the events that unfolded, exploring their impact on me. It also involves the perspectives from Aamina and Athena, both in the beginning of transition. In some of the scenes we reenact situations me and Meril faced, which Aamina and Athena may also confront in their futures.

Through this story the three of us give a sincere account of our experience of transition, future and womanhood. The story moves fluidly between past and present, intertwining reconstructed memories, documentary footage of us three trying to make the film as we return to the secluded Thai town where Meril and I met, and secret video diaries from 2012, initially for my own personal reflection. Meril’s fragmented story remains a consistent presence, her absence felt throughout. This film is a grieving process, a way to get closer to my memory of Meril.

I wanted to understand who we were and how it could end like this. It delves into existential questions of meaning and trans women’s relationship to mortality. It is about the physical changes one goes through in a transition, also about the inner journey that is less tangible. It’s a movie made by and about trans people, aiming for an honest portrayal of our lives. »






30 May 2024